Puddles © 2011 Amy Hillenbrand
8 x 8 oil on board
Oh, oh, oh....I had an Aha moment the other day. As I shared with you last time, I had decided it was time to start some art marketing and then I hit up against some big scary blockers. While those blockers may really exist in my sub-conscious, I also realized something else was going on. This is so fascinating. We humans are so fun to observe, aren't we? I was repeating a pattern that appears in my life each time I get ready to grow.
So here is the pattern. When I decide or commit to do something my cute adorable gremlins (ego) start spouting off really clever words to create fear and prohibit my growth. My poor little ego sees my growth as a threat, it wants me to stay exactly where I am. When I engage in trying to resist my ego, I go to the wonderful place called 'stuckness', which shows up as procrastination. Do you know it?
I now see this is just part of my natural process. I even talk about this in the beginnings of this art blog when the goal was just to paint. So instead of judging it and making myself feel bad, I am going to celebrate because it is a sign that I'm in growth mode. Yeah!!! Pretty cool Aha.
What are your patterns?